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Buy One Of The First Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Drawings Ever!

While the kids of the 80s and 90s are terrified that Michael Bay is going to rape their childhood, Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird are giving them a chance to hang on a bit longer, with one of the first Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle drawings ever!

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While the kids of the 80s and 90s are terrified that Michael Bay is going to rape their childhood, Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird are giving them a chance to hang on a bit longer, with one of the first Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle drawings ever!

According to Worst Previews, Eastman and Laird, the original creators of the tubular bunch, are auctioning off the drawing.  Eastman also explained how the Turtles originally came to be:

“Late in November 1983, Peter Laird and I were sharing a studio (our living room) in Dover, New Hampshire. One work night, in an effort to make Peter laugh, I drew a sketch of this character I called a ‘Ninja Turtle’ and threw it onto Peter’s desk. He did laugh, and did a version of his own — to which I needed to take it one step further, and did a pencil sketch of four different Turtles, each holding a different weapon — and gave it to Peter, who wanted to ink it in — and when he did, he added ‘Teenage Mutant’ to the ‘Ninja Turtle’ part of the logo, and we both fell off our chairs!

The next day, we both looked at the drawing, and decided that we really needed to come up with a story about how these characters came to be — and began to hammer out the story details. Deciding to make it an homage/parody to some of our heroes and inspirations (and dedicating it to them) we worked through the winter of 1983-84 and, after finding a local New England printer, we borrowed money from my Uncle Quentin and we printed the first 3,000 copies — premiering the book at a local Portsmouth comic convention May 5th, 1984.

From that day forward, and for the next 30 years, the TMNTs became a worldwide phenomenon (cartoons, toys, and movies) that even to this day we still try to completely understand — and it all started with this drawing.”

It’s as simple as that.  To hear that such an innocent story shaped our childhood makes me smile.
The current bid is somewhere around $5,500.  The auction (if you have the money) will take place on May 10th in Dallas, TX.

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Disney+ Series ‘Muppets Now’ Reveals Shocking Detail About The Swedish Chef

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Bork, Bork, Bork?!

If you haven’t taken the time to check out the new Disney+ series Muppets Now, stop reading and start streaming! The improv sitcom is an unscripted, segmented series in which our favorite fur-covered friends put together a digital show. Think The Muppet Show meets millennials. I watched the first episode, which became available for streaming as of July 31st, and I smiled through the entire thirty minutes. It’s cute and campy and reminds us all why we love The Muppets so much. I was enjoying the childhood nostalgia of seeing Kermit the Frog, Fozzie Bear, Miss Piggy and the rest of the gang when suddenly our favorite gibberish-spewing chef came on the screen to partake in a cooking challenge. Of course I was prepared to giggle at the Swedish Chef’s horrendous attempt at cooking but I was immediately distracted and could only focus on one shocking detail!

Credit: Muppets Now

Did you see it? Can you see what I was distracted by?! The stached Swede is wearing a wedding ring on his left hand! The Swedish Chef is married?!?!

Credit: Muppets Now

I mean, sure, it’s not surprising with the sexy foreign accent and killer eyebrows but still, I would have never guessed the chef had someone waiting at home for him! Since the chef is one of the few Muppets to actually feature human hands, I first thought the ring might have belonged to a neglectful puppeteer who forgot to take off their ring. But I did a quick Wikipedia search and apparently the Swedish Chef has been donning the gold ring since 2010 and is known to be married!

I guess there truly is a lid for every pot.

Muppets Now is now available for streaming on Disney+.

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‘The Late Show With Stephen Colbert’ Parodied Dolly Parton To Create A Theme Song For All The ‘Karen’s’ Out There

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These “Karens” are workin’ 9 to 5 on our last nerve.

By now you probably know that the term “Karen” is typically reserved for white women who throw tantrums over things that don’t really require tantrum throwing. Amid the coronavirus pandemic, the “Karens” have been especially vocal about not wanting to wear a mask usually citing constitutional freedom as the reason. Over the passed few weeks we have seen headlines about these women coughing on pro-maskers, verbally assaulting eye witnesses and even destroying property all to prove the point that they can and will do whatever they want. It’s annoying. Well, The Late Show with Stephen Colbert took the these suburban lemons and turned them into a hilarious pitcher of lemonade with a parody of the Dolly Parton classic “Jolene,” appropriately renamed “Karen.”

The PSA begins with actual news footage covering the stories of anti-maskers before cutting to a vintage clip of Parton in a pink jumpsuit with an anonymous singer belting out the altered lyrics which poke fun at all the angry scene makers. “You go on rants at Trader Joe’s, sit on the ground at the Costco, say wearing masks is the devil’s law,” the unseen singer croons. “Karen, Karen, Karen, Karen, please just wear a mask you big dumbass” she continues to implore.

Like all good satire, the video is hilarious but also contains an important message. The CDC as well as countless medical professionals have all agreed that wearing a mask is the best way to prevent the spread of the ongoing coronavirus pandemic.

Wear a mask! And check out the funny video below!

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‘HQ Words’ Host Anna Roisman Wrote A ‘Porno’ When She Was 8 And It Is Hilarious

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There are illustrations and everything.

***NSFW-ish***

I never went to sleep-away camp but after seeing what Anna Roisman worked on one summer when she was 8 I kinda wish I did.

Comedian and HQ Words host Anna Roisman took to social media earlier to share the pornographic novel she and her best friend wrote at sleep away camp. The novel, which her mother preserved in bubble wrap, is entitled “The Funky D**k Baby” and serves as a hilarious look into the naive mind of an 8-year old. The adult-ish story centers on a man and a “women” who have anatomically incorrect intercourse which results in an even more anatomically incorrect pregnancy and birth.

The entire video is riddled with infectious giggles and ends with Roisman revealing that her father hates the book which just makes the entire thing even funnier. Fatherly disproval and an obscure plot line? Sounds like the makings of any good porn though, really.

Check out the hilarious video below!

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