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WEEKEND MOVIE PREVIEW for 6/22/12

A busy weekend with 3 major motion pictures and 1 Woody Allen movie hitting screens all over the country – including a former president that’s actually vampire hunter?!?. Here are the movies, and their trailers…

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A busy weekend with 3 major motion pictures and 1 Woody Allen movie hitting screens all over the country.

 ABRAHAM LINCOLN: VAMPIRE HUNTER- Based on the piece of historical fiction by Seth Grahame-Smith, Directed by action master Timur Bekmambetov(WANTED, NIGHT WATCH) and Produced by Tim Burton(I’m Surprised he didn’t at least try to get Johnny Depp to star in this). If you have not heard of the book then you probably laughed fairly hard when you saw the trailer. The Book is hilariously good yet even with a cast that includes Anthony Mackie and Dominic Cooper along with relative unknown Benjamin Walker playing easy abe do not be surprised if this movie does poorly with critics and struggles to make it’s budget back. I’d say right now its buyer beware and wait and see what your friends think because it could be a cult classic or it could really stink it is very difficult to tell.

BRAVE- The Newest film from Ultra-Successful Disney/Pixar. Someone can correct me on this one but i really don’t think they have EVER made a bad movie. The synopsis sounds like a old time disney classic “Determined to make her own path in life, Princess Merida defies a custom that brings chaos to her kingdom. Granted one wish, Merida must rely on her bravery and her archery skills to undo a beastly curse.” A solid cast of voices including Kelly Macdonald(NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN) Billy Connolly(THE BOONDOCK SAINTS, and Emma Thompson (NANNY MCPHEE) and with supporting roles to Kevin McKidd(KINGDOM OF HEAVEN), Robbie Coltrane(HARRY POTTER SERIES) and Craig Ferguson( THE LATE LATE SHOW) it has that disney starpower. Mike Finklestein has already seen it and liked it but did not love it but it’s Disney/Pixar and BRAVE is a solid choice to get the kids out of the sun.

SEEKING A FRIEND FOR THE END OF THE WORLD- This one is fairly straight forward, a Romantic Comedy/Drama starring Steve Carrell(I REALLY DON’T NEED TO LIST WHERE HE IS FROM RIGHT?) and Keira Knightly play two neighbors who after their lives have fallen apart due to an incoming meotor that will destroy earth go on a roadtrip to see their families and reunite Dodge(Carell) with the one that got away. Co-starring are Patton Oswalt, Connie Britton, Adam Brody, Rob Corddry and Melanie Lynskey SEEKING A FRIEND actually looks pretty funny with a solid cast and very intruiging plot for a comedy. Directed by Lorene Scafaria making her directorial debut from the script she wrote. She looks to get people to see a movie in which we already know the ultimate ending yet the whole idea looks like if it plays out could be very rewarding. I look forward to seeing this movie this weekend to see if she pulls it off with the excellent cast of comedy pros.

TO ROME WITH LOVE- An all star cast that include Jesse Eisenberg, Alec Baldwin, Ellen Page, Greta Gerwig, Penelope Cruz, Woody Allen and Roberto Benigni about finding love, fame and trouble in rome. I am a fairly big fan of most of Woody Allen’s work, some of his new stuff, MIDNIGHT IN PARIS especially has been very good as well. Woody Allen always seems to find a way to transport the audience to every location especially his trips through the streets of Paris and Barcelona would make anyone want to take a long vacation. Yet Woody finds a huge cast that rivals the brilliant one in MIDNIGHT IN PARIS but probably a little bigger thanks to the emergence of Greta Gerwig and Jesse Eisenberg. The question is always how will he find enough screen time to tell the stories of all of these characters without making the movie an unbearable 3 hours long? If anyone can do it besides Tarantino and Scorsese its a pretty good bet that its Woody Allen. TO ROME WITH LOVE is not playing everywhere to start off but will look to jump to more theaters over the next few weeks.

In Summation, Be weary of most vampire movies even if they star the 16th president, Disney/Pixar’s BRAVE is a good bet to get the kids out of the heat, SEEKING A FRIEND AT THE END OF THE WORLD looks very funny even if it’s characters are already doomed, and Woody Allen movies rarely disappoint.

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The Pentagon Has Released Official UFO Videos Because 2020 Is The Absolute Worst

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Aren’t swarms of locusts supposed to be the next installment of this plague?!

Can we finally declare 2020 as the worst year ever? In January there were fears of a third World War. In February the coronavirus began its rapid spread. In March the world essentially shut down due to social distancing and quarantining. And now in April…with only two days left in the month…we have official government footage of unidentified flying objects. I’m sorry but Milton Bradley’s game of “Life” never prepared me for any of this!

The Pentagon has confirmed the authenticity of three videos that have been circulating the web but didn’t really answer what is visible in them. In the videos, now declassified by the Department of Defense, navy pilots capture “unidentified aerial phenomena” aka unidentified flying objects aka UFOs! Pentagon officials were sure to state that the videos do not show “any sensitive capabilities or systems,” meaning we probably won’t be seeing any little green men any time soon.

The first video dates back to November 2004 and the other two from January 2015. Of the Pentagon’s confirmation of authenticity, Pentagon spokesperson Sue Gough said the videos were released “in order to clear up any misconceptions by the public on whether or not the footage that has been circulating was real, or whether or not there is more to the videos.”

So great. We now know that these strange videos are real but what exactly are we looking at? Well, the Department of Defense says it has no concrete answer as to what might be floating around the skies and has classified the phenomena as “unidentified.” And…just like that I suddenly feel less defended.

Social media is having a field day with this revelation of course. The #AliensAreReal has been trending high on Twitter since the news broke. One user referenced Independence Day and said the aliens are “getting ready for July 4th.” Of the bad timing, another wrote “Et tu aliens?” And finally one user couldn’t help avoid sarcasm and wrote”Where’s the space force when you need it?”

Well 2020, you have worked your awful black magic once again. What’s next, cat videos get banned from the internet?! You’ve taken everything else from us!

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Priest Accidentally Forgets To Turn Off Filters Before Live Streaming Mass

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The internet is having a field day with the innocent mistake of biblical proportions.

With new social distancing guidelines, many churches have closed to help prevent the spread of the coronavirus. And while that doesn’t justify all the wine you’ve been chugging during your self quarantine, it does have many people practicing their faith from their homes. One Italian priest was just trying to recite a little prayer for his followers when he accidentally left a filter feature on during the broadcast! In the clip the priest is digitally adorned with a space helmet, workout gear, a fedora and sunglasses and more.

Social media went nuts for the video, which has now gone viral. One comment reads “He just doubled his holy power.” Another reads “Father, Son and Holy Influencer.” One commenter couldn’t resist a good pun and said the video is having a “Mass effect.”

Enjoy your daily blessing and take a look at the funny video below!

 

Priest in Italy live streams mass, activates filters by mistake from r/funny

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Danny DeVito Passionately Urges New Yorkers To Stay Home…And Twitter Agrees!

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For the love of Danny DeVito, stay home!

The world is in a dark place right now and I am not sure how much more bad news we can handle. That’s why when I saw Danny DeVito’s name trending on Twitter I froze. Our great nation could very well crumble if anything bad was to happen to such an icon right now. With extreme trepidation I clicked on the social media link and was relieved to see that good ol’ Danny boy is just strumming up hype because he is passionately urging New Yorkers to stay home.

Amid the coronavirus outbreak, Governor Andrew Cuomo has been driving New Yorkers to stay home and has taken every precaution short of shutting the state down completely to help prevent the virus from spreading. Because New Yorkers can be hard headed, it doesn’t hurt to have some famous friends reiterate your message. Big names like Lala Anthony, Robert De Niro and Ben Stiller have all made appearances on Cuomo’s social media pleading with New Yorker’s to heed the governors warning. Only one celebrity was able to make it to Twitter’s trending page however and that was none other than Danny DeVito. DeVito’s message is simple…stay home! In the two minute video, DeVito reminds fans that it’s not just up to the elderly to isolate themselves. “Young people can get it and they can transmit it to old people and the next thing you know – I’m out of there” says the actor. We must save him!

Twitter went into a frenzy with many users agreeing that we need to stay home for Danny. One user wrote “When Danny speaks, I listen.” Another passionately wrote “If you idiots kill Danny DeVito I SWEAR TO GOD.” One promoted DeVito from the icon status I previously awarded him and said “WE GOTTA PROTECT WORLD TREASURE DANNY DeVITO.” 

Take a look at the video below and for the love of the newly minted national treasure, stay home!

 

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