I will preface this entire post by saying that I was flirting with the 200-lb mark by junior high school. Needless to say I’ve never exactly been the sporty type. While I support the idea of teamwork, 7-layer dips and men in tight pants, I have to admit I usually get bored while half watching the Super Bowl with my roommate.
For Super Bowl LIII, I thought I’d be proactive! Rather than just sitting around waiting for the next refill on tortilla chips, I thought I’d prepare a list of good, alternative tv options to watch instead. If you’re like me and don’t want to fall victim to a Super Bowl snooze, check out the list below!
Puppy Bowl XV – Animal Planet – 3pm EST
This really should’t take much convincing. It’s puppies playing together for hours on end! No need to worry about deflated footballs with this group, the biggest crime happening here might just be an overzealous pup with an overactive bladder.
Dr. Pimple Popper: The Poppy Bowl – TLC – 5pm-11pm EST
I would recommend keeping the queso dip out of the room for this one. TLC will be airing a 6-hour marathon of America’s newest sensation, Dr. Pimple Popper, during the Big Game. The 6, fan-favorite episodes will feature Dr. Sandra Lee popping zits while also showing some never-before-seen footage. Can’t you just burst with excitement?!
Worst Cooks In America – Food Network – 8pm EST
Once you are basking in the success of your microwaved chicken tenders, you may feel inspired to watch a little Food Network. Luckily, there’s a mini marathon of Worst Cooks In America which culminate in a new episode starting at 8pm. I feel kind of like a champ myself after I watch this.
Velvet Buzzsaw – Streaming starting February 1st – Netflix
If you are truly talented, you could stream Velvet Buzzsaw on your phone whilst feigning enthusiasm about the Big Game AT THE SAME TIME! It might just be my greatest challenge yet. The super intense Netflix original seems like it will give you just as many heart palpitations as any sporting event. The plot is a bit vague but basically bad things are happening to people who bought some art? If nothing else, you get to stare at Jake Gyllenhaal for 2 hours.
Finding Nemo & Finding Dory – Freeform – 4:45pm EST
Sure they’re not anything new but seeing these two films back to back is the best way to spend any night…Super Bowl or not! The classic tale of runaway fish is brilliantly told by Disney/Pixar in two different ways. Trade in the chicken wings for fish sticks and a themed party could still be on the calendar.
Did my list score a touchdown or will you stick to watching the Big Game? If you insist on seeing those tight pants run around the field be sure to check out the LA Rams take on the New England Patriots during Super Bowl LIII on February 3 at 6:30pm EST on CBS.